A Decade of Life!

It's hard to reflect back on the events of today in 2002. I feel a well of life inside me but also a deep sadness. I made it. Like the mythical bird who rises from the ashes, I am a phoenix. On March 20, 2002, I lost part of me. Not the obvious physical part; but I lost a deep psychological part of me. While I do not have remorse for having lived while two of my fellow soldiers died, I do have remorse for the others who suffered in that horrific accident and the family members of my fallen comrades. All told, 13 of us were injured and two died. But more than just two human lives died that day. I think a small part of us all died that day.

Many of us who were there have permanent physical and emotional scars. While I do not suffer from PTSD related to that event, I do carry the burden of being a survivor. I love my life and am glad I survived. But believe me when I say that I would have taken all the force, all the shrapnel and all the pain in the world if it meant that nobody else would have been touched. If It meant that SSG Rick Hall and PFC William Hamm would still be here today. If it meant that nobody else had to endure any pain from that day.

March 20th will always be a special day to me. I may not celebrate it. I may just take time to reflect internally. But this day will always be one of the most important days of my life. It's what drives me. It's who I am. I am a survivor. The outpouring on Facebook to my posted reflection on this decade anniversary validates how my story and how I have chosen to live my life has touched people and I am truly honored to be able to inspire people. Thank you to everyone who has played a role in my life since that day. My wife and two beautiful children, my parents, my mother and father-in-law, my friends and those I have met along the way.

Rest in Peace SSG Hall and PFC Hamm. I have not, nor will I ever forget you. To those injured, I hope you have come to peace with your injuries and moved on from the physical pain. I hope you take time to reflect on how lucky we were to have survived and how you have an obligation to live your lives with success and love since two of us will never be able to do that again.

Thank you Rachel, Sam and Annabelle. You are my life, my heart and my soul. You make me happy I survived!

To life!